The Journey

I never thought I would die like this. Blood courses through my veins at a pace never yet calculated. My knees buckle with every step, my legs have gotten numb. My brain functions like a computer dumped in a pool, haywire and disoriented. I have no power to fight back, no energy to try. My heart beats and beats, like a drum before an intimidating battle. I fear the monster of death, as do I detest my disaster of a life. I am in Limbo, a no man’s land, far from my hopes and dreams. My actions have disappointed my goals, as they are of 2 different worlds. This battle I cannot win, for both results would be a downward spiral. What am I, a speck in the gargantuan beast of the universe? What does it matter if I live or die, no one would remember my name. I take short strides, while trying to keep my composure. I feel like curling up on the ground and crawling into a blanket, safe from the scary reality of life and destruction. But, alas, I am a grown man, not a fearful child. So why should I hide from the fact of death, when it is so clearly heading my way?

The time has almost arrived, the time of eternal peace. My legs betray me, walking my death route, as my mind shouts and whines to run away. “Come hither, come hither!” the angel of death calls to me casually, as if it has no effect upon him. Who is he to take my life? What noble act has he committed? If I were to take the life of this “angel”, he would rot and decay along with his soul, for no angel of death would come to retrieve him. I wish to make this ‘thing’ suffer, for he has no right to take my life without good reason. I trudge forward, dismayed and discouraged. My march is almost over, and I am almost free. My confidence is depleted, like a runner’s energy after a marathon. I allow them to push me, shove me, as they treat me like a pile of dirt. I am almost there.

Orders, screams, insults. All these distractions are flushed away from my ears. My mind is focused on acceptance of my destiny, the bare, naked truth that every man, woman, and child must eventually encounter long down the road of life. This is not a happy fact, nor one that is looked forward to. This fact is death.

They say a man’s life flashes before his eyes right before he dies. I am here. It is time. I am not scared; I am not worried. I know I am not meant to be here, but I accept the fact anyway. It is a fact of life that is meant to be accepted. Curse you, angel of death, and all your followers.  For one day you will pay the price, for all the lives you have taken with no reasonable purpose.

Here I am, an innocent man, hanged for his crimes against the earth.